Robin Sparkles, is that you?
Robin Sparkles and Jessica Glitter star in 'Space Teens'
When my brother first pointed me to the video “Friday” by Rebecca Black, I wasn’t sure what to think. It featured skinny pre-teens with pimply faces driving with a green screen behind them. It featured a girl who sang with the aid of Autotune and sound warping. Plus, what’s up with the rapper in the middle? Was he there to add street cred to the poor girl? It was a senseless song with inane lyrics. In fact, why don’t we go over them right now?
Yesterday was Thursday, Thursday
Today i-is Friday, Friday (Partyin’)
We-we-we so excited
We so excited
We gonna have a ball today
Tomorrow is Saturday
And Sunday comes after…wards
I don’t want this weekend to end
Tomorrow is Saturday
And Sunday comes after…wards
I don’t want this weekend to end
In short, the whole thing forcibly reminded me of “Let’s Go To The Mall” by How I Met Your Mother’s Robin Sparkles. Except that the show did it as a spoof, while Rebecca Black seemed dead serious. So serious, that she went through the whole song looking like she was being made to sing at gunpoint.
Think of this as the high-end, infinitely more expensive version of Great Image barkada photos.
But let’s not blame the poor girl; let’s blame Ark Music Factory, which took its name a little too literally by targeting teenage girls with rich parents and feeding on their dreams of becoming pop stars. Which is why a slew of talentless teens have their own music video under Ark. Luckily for them, none of their videos hit the viral button the way Rebecca Black’s did. It’s a shame, because give her a few years (and strip away her delusions of becoming a pop star) and she’ll be quite pretty. Sort of like Lucy Hale of Pretty Little Liars. Maybe with some makeup, and less singing..
"Fun fun fun fun"
The birth of Autotune was an unfortunate thing for the music industry—so Rebecca Black’s disastrous video could actually be a good development, because it shows how talents are just manufactured in a studio. Sad!
