I believe in fairy tale romances. Which is why I also believe that before you meet your prince, you have to kiss more than a few frogs (once in a while, I also encounter guys who make me feel that I’d much rather lock lips with a frog). Being in my mid-20s, I’ve dated enough guys to be able to laugh at and agree with the stereotypes the Greenwich Pasta Supreme commercial presented in their “imperfex” campaign.
(Click on the rest of the entry to find out how you can win a pasta/pizza party for 10 people!)
1. The Bad Boy
Line: “It’s not me. It’s you.”
Relationship status: It’s always complicated.
This guy is bad news. He’s the guy your mom warned you about. Still, you seem drawn to his rebellious, living-on-the-edge, devil-may-care attitude. He can get away with being a complete ##%$%^$%^ and you’ll still fall in love with him. Piece of advice? Listen to your mom.
2. The Player
Line: “Hey Joanne… este, Janelle.”
Relationship status: In a relationship with—???
This effortlessly good-looking boy with his disheveled yet put-together façade attracts women like bees to honey. All the chicks want him. And so do you. Thing is, he wants all of you too! He’s actually not that bad—if you don’t mind sharing with other women. Do you?
3. The User
Line: “Hon, may barya ka?”
Relationship status: In relationship… with your wallet.
The perpetual leech—he thinks he can charm you into anything. It starts with the small thing like picking fries off your plate, asking if he can call or text using your phone and before you know it, you’re picking up the tab on everything. Sure, it makes you feel like he needs you but are the freebies getting a little too far? Reality check: You aren’t his honey, darling. You’re his sugar momma.
4. The Gamer
Line: “Hmm…? Ha? Oh! Hon, paabot naman ng tubig.”
Relationship status: In a relationship with you and any gadget with lots of buttons.
You swear he has A.D.D., or at least a selective version of it. The world could end and he wouldn’t even notice because he’s playing his stupid game. His eyes never leave the screen and his mouth is agape; it drives you crazy that nothing ever exits from his mouth except for a yelp or screech and when he occasionally asks you to get something. If it’s that bad, it’s either you pull the plug on his game or on your relationship.
5. The Ditcher
Line: “Hon, sorry pero tumatawag yung barkada ko eh.”
Relationship status: In a relationship ka ba talaga?!
Consideration. That’s not a lot to ask, is it? He seems so eager to make plans with you one minute, and the moment something better comes along, he makes a beeline for it. And you don’t have a say in the matter whatsoever. Ito lang: if he ditches you, ditch him.
6. The Mama’s Boy
Line: “Uwi tayo ng maaga ah. Walang kasama mommy ko sa bahay.”
Relationship status: In a relationship—with his mother
You know what they say, a guy who respects his mother, respects women too. So aren’t you glad you landed a mama’s boy? NOT. So every time she calls at even the most inopportune of times (you know what I mean!), he takes it, every time he she calls him to come home, he has to come home. Family values? Cool. But does he value you and your relationship?
7. The Workaholic
Line: “Next week nalang tayo magkita. Overtime ako eh.”
Relationship status: In a relationship—with his desk.
Every time you ask him a question, ang sagot: “work eh” or “overtime eh.” You can say he’s driven, hardworking, and at least he’s not cheating on you. But does that make him a good boyfriend? Maybe, if he were half as dedicated to you as he is to his job.
8. The Whiner
Line: “Bakit ganito yung food?! We’re not getting our money’s worth. Nasaan yung manager?”
Relationship status: In a bad relationship with…anyone and anything.
He’s going to nitpick on everything, from why you did this and that to why to why his job sucks. It’s as if the whole world is out to get him and he deserves so much more. Please, woman, do not be his emotional punching bag. You are not some noise-absorbing board that can handle all his blabbering.
9. The White Liar
Line: “May family dinner ako eh. Ay, high school reunion pala.”
Relationship status: Who really knows?
The dangerous thing is that he’s so used to lying he became good at it. So even if your gut feel says he’s lying, your tendency is to let him off the hook because you love him. If you are better than this guy and you actually catch him lying, then be true to yourself. Do you really want to be in a relationship with someone you constantly want to attach to a lie detector?
10. The Boss
Line: “Ayoko yung suot mo. Magpalit ka nga.”
Relationship status: In a relationship with people he can boss around. Only people he can boss around—including you.
He tells you what to do. Siya ang batas. What he says, goes. You’re like his personal Play-Doh which he can mold according to his unreasonable demands. Cut the strings, puppet girl. Let yourself be unattached to that wicked master and be finally free.
11. The Clingy Emo Boy
Line: “Hindi ka naman nagte-text eh. Galit ka ba? May ginawa ba ako?”
Relationship status: Verrrrry much in a relationship with you.
He puts every drama queen to shame. He craves emotional confrontations and clings to you like Saran wrap. You can’t meet you family or friends because he interprets it as not wanting to spend quality time with him. He has absolutely no concept of personal space or “me” time. He’s like that bubble gum you can’t remove from your hair and which you can only get rid of by cutting. Snip him out of your life, will ‘ya?
12. Mr. Late-a-lot
Line: “Sorry! Akala ko 11:00 tayo magkikita… ‘di ko na-set yung alarm…”
Relationship status: In a relationship with you, except he isn’t there yet.
Rolled out of bed kasi kakagising lang. Laging late. He hardly prepares for anything. He has no sense of time and space, he just floats around like a bum. You try to synchronize your time with him, but you know you’ll never be in sync. So, why wait when you can date?
* * *
When we first read the stereotypes, a bunch of girlfriends and I just had to agree. Collectively, all the members of our group had managed to date every type in the list of 12. Of course, some guys were a combination of two types or more. “My God, what’s wrong with us?” a friend moaned. “We’re smart, well-educated women, we make our own money and can get all the things we want. Why are we dating the wrong guys?”
Personally, I think that sometimes, we have to date the wrong guys in order to find the right one—or to realize that the right one’s been there all along and you just didn’t know.
So what’s your date/boyfriend from hell story? Tell me about which boyfriend/ex/date stereotype you went through and what you did to resolve things. The most interesting story gets a Greenwich pasta/pizza party for 10 people! Just post your entries below. Don’t forget to leave your name and contact details. Deadline: March 27, 12 noon. Guys can join if they want to!
I got a combination of no.3 and 11 for a boyfriend before. I thought he was very decent and religious until we became a couple. First, he started to ask me to load his cellphone up. It was just OK, until I realized I was doing it for him almost every other day. I don’t mind the money, but it’s starting to ruin my monthly prepaid budget (because I just pass the load to him).
I paid for most expenses we have together (since he don’t have a job and is ‘still looking for one’)and he gets too clingy by checking where I am, who I am with, and spends too much time on the phone even when he knows I need to catch up on sleep or if I have work the next day.
The last straw went out when he asked me for money to pay for ‘his mom’s hospitalization’, when he wasn’t able to introduce me to his mom yet, and it was not yet one month that we were together (alongside the argument that we had because he didn’t allowed me to sleep over at the house of my BEST FRIEND for 7 years, a thing I have been doing ever since before I met him).
The next day, I did not replied to all of the text messages he sent me the whole day (who in a straight and pissed-off mind would?). And then he sent to me, ‘OK, Baby take care, Goodbye’.
I replied to him finally saying,
‘I NEED TO BREAK UP WITH YOU…’ along with a 3-part text message explaining why and ending it with a ‘THANK YOU FOR SAYING GOODBYE.’
And then, I sent messages to my best friend and close friends to announce I broke up with him and that they don’t have to worry because I feel fine.
The next day I tried to call him up to really make it official but his phone went unattended. The week has passed before he even realized that I actually broke up with him and even thought we were on a cool-off. When he called me up, he cried on the phone, confessing and saying sorry to the things he was guilty off and asked for us to be together again. I said a strong NO.
After 6 months, I am back on the dating field. He still tries to win me back, but no call or text message would win me back to him, especially now I have set my eyes on someone else. To other girls that may be in the similar situation as I have been, an advice: take off your helmets now! Everyone deserves someone who won’t treat you like a cash register. =)
Hahaha, oh my gosh, I love this entry! I also love that Greenwich commercial; it reminds me so much of boytalk moments with my girlfriends from high school, college, and Med!
reading this entry made me realize how bossy, workaholic, and a whiner i was, than thinking of how the combinations made up those guys.. haha! but, still the point is, the other characteristics are men-prone. so beware girls!! that greenwich commercial is really nice. who knows? the most imperfect might be the best?
I swear this is true.
I had a friend in college who had a much younger boyfriend. From time to time they engage in “carnal pleasures” but this boyfriend of hers wanted to notch things up a bit. So the guy suggested to my friend that he wanted to videotape their sessions, and not just any session mind you. He wanted to do it in one of the lavatories inside my friend’s school.
My friend agreed to the idea.
But that’s not the end of the story yet. The guy, who in his infinite wisdom and God-given smarts, just had to show the video to his barkada. The guy actually bragged about the video and challenged his barkada if they could do what he did. One of the guy’s kabarkada told my friend about what happened which made the girl fuming mad.
And what did the girl do? She asked me for help on retrieving the video tape (Like I was some sort of a retrieval expert hahaha). It wasn’t even like I even know the guy. Some months later, the girl, so depressed by what happened, decided to move to another country.
I couldn’t say that I dated this guy but we were really good friends and of course, there was obviously a spark between us! I was a graduating student back then and this guy was also on his fifth year as an Engineering student. One time, he texted and asked me out if we could have dinner at Mcdo. Since it was going to be my last year in our campus, I’ve said that it would be my treat but on our way home, he should pay for the FX fare because I only have a few bucks left on my wallet(because of our thesis expenses and besides, it was biglaan). I thought we both understood this “negotiation” since he was the one who asked for this meet up!
After our dinner, we already decided to go home. We were inside the FX when I noticed he wasn’t still paying our fare. I asked him why he hasn’t paid the driver yet. Then he said,”I already have the exact fare for myself! I know you still have enough money to go home”. Then he already took off at Philcoa and didn’t even thank me for the treat! What a loser! I got really furious!
I was really worried because I didn’t know what to do! I was at the passenger seat when a woman sat beside me after that loser took off.
And I didn’t really expect that I was going to do something so pathetic! But I really had to do this so I can go home.. I asked the woman beside me could give me a few bucks, and I told her what exactly happened. Luckily, she believed in me and handed over the money. What a good Samaritan! In these trying times, it’s really hard to talk to strangers and for her to believe in me was really a blessing!
The next day, he apologized to me but I didn’t forgive him because I didn’t really see the effort that he was sorry for what he did tome. Don’t force something that isn’t there and don’t ever change yourself to fit someone else’s needs. Remember if your life isn’t going well the answer isn’t to find the perfect guy, the answer is to make yourself better, make yourself happier with who you are.
Very nice entry..hit me big time.. Memories with X boyfriend from hell came back..
-Very clingy.. as in.. he has to know every single minute where I was kahit nasa office lang naman ako, ano ginagawa ko..I even get reprimanded by my boss because he calls almost every 30 minutes in a day just to check what I’m doing. Gets angry if my texts never end with “bilysm” which stands for babyiloveyousomuch and he thinks that we have a problem
- Scolds me everytime I tell him that I will see my friends and tells me what to wear.
-Pati hair ko pinapakialaman, bawal daw ako magpagupit.
-Obligasyon ko iload siya para lang matext nya ko at matanong kung ano na pinagkakaabalahan ko!
-Since he has no work, I sponsor his job hunting days pati pagkuha nya ng sedula sagot ko..(sad but true)
-When he has money, kanya lang yun pero pag bonus ko kailangan part siya sa list ko..
-Everytime we go out, I have to pay the bill from transpo, food, movies, etc. ( sugar mommy to the highest level..)
-Borrows money for different reasons (nag fofollow up pa pag kinulang)
- Kinakaladkad ako sa mall pag nag-aaway kami at kinukuha ang phone and wallet ko para di ako makasakay ng taxi, kailangan maging okay muna kami bago matapos ang date since I will pay for the transpo..
-Emo to the max, when we had a fight,he punches walls, floors to make me feel guilty, he even gave me a 6 page letter using his blood to write it, as if naman, when I asked kung saan galing yung blood he showed me his pinky na naka band aid ( pathetic much)
-Gusto nya pa nung nagbreak kami, isoli ko lahat ng binigay nya, e puro letters lang naman, yung singsing na suot ko, halos lahat ako pa nagbayad.. kapal talaga ng mukha!
All of this are facts, it happened.. sa yaw at sa gusto ko.. sinisisi ko din sarili ko kasi I let all of this happen pero siguro part na yun ng pag grow ko as a person.
After two years of enduring this kind of relationship, I broke up with him, he called me names and told me to rot in hell. As if I will care, I’ve been to hell with him and I know that I’ll be happy without him.
I am now married with a beautiful daughter.. I still pay for our dinner dates but with my husband’s money..
I wonder where this fits? I once dated a model: tall, dark and handsome and all. Naturally I was proud of my, er, ‘catch’ and presented him to my best friend for approval on a sorta-group-date.
Unfortunately when I introduced him to my best friend, he rolled up his sleeve, presented his bulging arms to my friend and said, “Do you like my biceps?”
It’s been over a decade and I STILL haven’t lived that down. She went to the CR after pretending to admire his muscles and banged her head on a restroom door in a desperate attempt to try and stop laughing. I know, because when I followed her there, she burst into fresh gales of laughter and needed five minutes to calm down.
It doesn’t end there. When I gave up on him, I beeped him (which should tell you how frigging old I am) and said, “I think I need to be away from you.” I thought that was the end of it when he didn’t respond.
Three months later, he beeped me back (!) and asked, “Why you not call me anymore? Are you breakup me? Miss you.”
before i ever start this entry, i just finished up large fries and large coke — which is our (me and my ex-boyfriend from hell) fave. and then i laughed. i laughed so hard coz pictures from the past started flashing back on my mind.
we’ve been together for like, um, 6 months. (which made me laugh harder coz then i realized i was able to bear with him for half a year. i mean, what’s wrong with me?!)
the guy already had a daughter with her ex – which was ok with me (see?! now, i’m really starting to wonder if i have some serious mental problems.) and would occasionally be the start of our fights coz when he’s angry with his daughter’s mother, he would also be pissed of me.
the first month was flawless. we hang out, we text each other regularly, i introduced him to my parents… and so forth and so on. things that usually happen in an “ok” relationship.
the next month was different. he was starting to tell financial problems and starting to get UBER jealous to the max. he gets jealous with my friends, my classmates, my officemates, my boss, and worst, my relatives. we had some petty fights which at the end, he would make it seem like it was always my fault . the blame’s always on me. but then, i was too blinded to see what’s wrong since it was like i was head over heels inlove with him.
the third month, i was always the “taya”. i was in charge of our prepaid credits, of our dates(food, transpo, gala and everything). he wouldn’t text me up (which would drive me crazy that time) if i don’t load him up.
after that, i was always the one who goes to their place since he always mention he have no money to take care of the transpo fees and then i’ll pay for everything. sometimes, i give him money for him to pay me a visit so that my parents wouldn’t think bad of him that i was the one who always visit him. but then, on the scheduled day of his visit, i would end up waiting for nothing then he’ll just say he’s sorry coz there had been an emergency and he needed to spend the money.
he wanted to know all of my social networking sites password and wouldn’t let me know his. he would get mad if my text message would be delayed for even just a minute. he wouldn’t want to meet my friends and wouldn’t let me be with them too. he gets angry if we have outings and he wasn’t informed of it at least 2 weeks before (well, my family loves to go anyplace elsewhere so it’s not surprising if we schedule an out of town 2 days before). i keep on explaining that to him and he wouldn’t listen, and as usual, put the blame on me.
the next month, he was able to buy himself his own motorcycle which i thought was ok since at least we can go out without me having to pay for the transpo fees (i didn’t thought of anything of him since he said his sister help him pay for the motorcycle). at first, there were times that he gave me a ride from work to home, which felt nice to me. there had been times that i really needed his help since i cannot afford to be late again to work and i really needed a fast ride. so i texted him and asked him to fetch me from home to work so that i could avoid heavy traffic. he refused and said that his tank was almost empty. then i volunteered to pay for filling of his tank just as so i wouldn’t be late for work. then, since then, everytime we have to go out, i was always the one who have to pay for the gas. (how i wished he didn’t have that motorcycle coz it was just another expense for me.)
after that, i started to feel that i don’t deserve everything – i don’t deserve the relationship, i don’t desereve the treatment and most especially i don’t deserve him.
one night, me and my officemates have a night out to celebrate the end of the training period. it was like a graduation celebration for us trainees with our trainer which was really good and kind to us. so i know, i can’t afford to miss that night. my family agreed when i told them that i will be late on that day. then, i told my super ass boyfriend about it and as usual, i know, he wouldn’t agree to that. but my decision was firm. i have to be there on that night, whether he likes it or not.
and that was what happened. we (me and my officemates went out) after work. i was employed with a company near MOA that time and that was a few minutes from my boyfriend’s place which was in villamor. of course, we went to one of the bars near the bay. what happened was, he never texted me that night which was not a surprise since i know he will be mad at me and think something bad about me. but what suprised me was, he appeared there that night. he was drunk and was ready to start a fight with me or with whoever will oppose him.
i was shocked, i know what he might do knowing what kind of person he was. so i immediately asked him to speak with me somewhere private. he talked, he shouted at me, he was even ready to hurt me physically which might have happen if there were no security guards around MOA (thanks to them for being around), he called me names, accused me of being something i am not. it was a MAJOR TURN OFF. after his speech, i’m ready to get rid of him and dump him. and that’s what i did. i bid goodbye and told him that i don’t wanna see his face anymore. to my shock, he punched the road, he threw his helmet and cursed. it called the security guards attention. and because i don’t want to make any scene or any news with the situation, i just told the guard it was nothing. it was just some sort of misunderstanding. he begged me to wait for our 7th monthsarry before i break up with him and he promised he’ll change. but it nver appealed to me anymore. i cannot believe any word he say though i can see sadness in his eyes. all that’s running to my mind is that i’ve had enough.
and that was how it all ended. that’s how i finally get over something that i don’t deserve. and you’re definitely right, i’m smart, i’m a well-educated women, i make my own money and i can get all the things i want. what i don’t understand is that why had i ever dated that guy and had been with him for half a year?? whooaa.
he still text me from time to time since i never change my sim card. but i don’t care anymore. sometimes, when i see his name appear in my inbox, i delete it immediately even without reading it. i don’t care anymore. i don’t wanna hear any word he says. coz since that night, i was totally over him.
Every woman deserves a good man.
I have to be honest, being a man and writing here would only hurt (most men’s ego and particularly mine)but it only takes a real man to do so right? So here is an honest answer coming from a guy.
If there is one mistake I did in my past relationship, is that I was the Bad Boy/two-timer Type. My life’s motto back then was:”Devil may care, I didn’t”. I was in a relationship with “jessica”(not her real name)and was past 4 months into our relationship.
I was reckless and maybe naive too, I thought girls may come and go and so I “played” with their hearts. jessica didn’t know she was not the only girl who I am having a relationship with. There were another 2.
One night, I asked jessica to have a dinner out with me. The date went well and as I was driving jessica back home, i received a text from the other girl asking if I want to go out. I replied:”sure”. So after I said goodnight to jessica, went to pick up my other girl and we went to this coffee shop. We went to order and sat in the sofa and started flirting… and Lo and behold look who I saw there. My girlfriend’s parents (jessica’s parents. CRAP! As they noticed me and starting to approach our table, I didn’t know what to do! I ended up excusing myself to the girl and telling her i’d be right back and I quickly went to reach jessica’s parent before they even see the girl who I’m with. To make this story short though, I probably guess jessica’s parent already had a haunch that I was two-timing their daughter since the next day jessica asked to have a conversation with me. Which I ended up telling her the truth. Jessica broked up with me. As for the other girl? Well, to be honest, she was just a fling. a stupid mistake I will regret.
That was 7 years ago. I’ve finally grown up and learned my mistakes. Never play somebody else’ heart you’ll end up hurting yours in the end. I look back and see myself stupid but we all learn one way or another (just give us guys some time to find our way, we are cave man after all..)
Today, I’m committed to a beautiful woman who sees beyond my past mistakes and who loves me as I am.
We all just need a time to find the right soulmate.